Digital Romance: Love and Lies in the Age of Online Dating
By Nomako
Accra, Ghana — When 26-year-old Leticia Mensah matched with “Kelvin” on Instagram, he seemed perfect — charming, attentive, and successful. After weeks of chatting, he asked for a loan to fix his car and promised to pay it back. She sent ₵500.
“He blocked me the next day,” she recalls. “I was heartbroken. And broke.”
Leticia is one of many Ghanaians navigating the modern maze of digital romance — where love blossoms through emojis, voice notes, and hashtags, but just as easily evaporates behind a screen.
Online dating is on the rise in Ghana, fueled by expanding internet access, mobile apps, and shifting social norms. From Facebook and Instagram DMs to Tinder, Badoo, and even TikTok flings, the search for companionship is increasingly playing out in the digital space.
But while many find connection and even lasting love, others are left dealing with deception, disappointment, and financial loss.
The Rise of Love Online
Gone are the days when dating relied solely on church socials, family introductions, or local spots. Today’s young Ghanaians are swiping, scrolling, and shooting their shot — from their bedrooms.
“I met my girlfriend on Twitter,” says David, a 28-year-old digital marketer. “I liked her thread on mental health. We started chatting. Two years later, we’re still together.”
In a 2023 survey by TechAfrica, 38% of urban youth in Ghana said they had tried meeting someone online. Among those aged 18–30, the number rose to over 55%.
Apps and platforms used include:
- Instagram and Facebook for casual flirting
- Tinder and Badoo for romantic interest
- AfroIntroductions and Christian Mingle for more serious seekers
- WhatsApp as the main tool for progressing the conversation
Why Digital Dating Works
1. Broader Reach
“You can meet people from other cities, cultures — even continents,” says Nana Ama, a university student who met her boyfriend in Lagos through TikTok.
2. Anonymity and Confidence
Many users say texting first removes the pressure of face-to-face rejection.
3. Flexibility
Busy professionals or students appreciate the ability to build relationships at their own pace.
4. Pandemic Legacy
COVID-19 lockdowns normalized virtual interactions — including virtual dates and long-distance connections.
But There’s a Dark Side
Catfishing and Romance Scams
Online predators use fake photos, identities, and emotional manipulation to build trust — and then ask for money.
“I was chatting with a woman who said she was in Accra,” says Yaw, 32. “We spoke daily for a month. Then she asked for mobile money for her mother’s surgery. I sent ₵1,000. Then she vanished.”
According to the Ghana Police CID, romance fraud cases spiked during the pandemic and remain a major cybercrime concern.
Ghosting and Emotional Burnout
Many users complain of being “ghosted” — suddenly cut off without explanation. Others report emotional fatigue from managing multiple chats and navigating unclear intentions.
“It’s hard to tell who’s serious,” says Leticia. “Some just want attention. Some are already in relationships.”
Unrealistic Expectations
Social media filters, curated images, and exaggerated profiles often lead to disappointment when people meet in real life.
A Gendered Experience
For many women, online dating comes with harassment, inappropriate messages, and safety concerns.
“I’ve had strangers send nudes, even after I say I’m not interested,” says Fatima, 25. “Now I’m more cautious about who I reply.”
Men, meanwhile, express frustration over “money diggers” or feeling pressured to impress with lifestyle posts.
“There’s a lot of performative dating,” says Michael, a nurse. “Everyone’s trying to look rich, interesting, or mysterious.”
Success Stories Exist
Not all digital romance ends in heartbreak.
Sandra and Kofi met on Facebook through a mutual friend’s comment thread. They got married last December.
“My parents were skeptical,” Sandra says. “But he turned out more genuine than any guy I met in person.”
Akwesi and Aisha connected on Tinder during lockdown. They now run a YouTube channel about couple life in Ghana.
“The internet brought us together,” Akwesi says. “We just had to be honest — and patient.”
Digital Dating Etiquette: Do’s and Don’ts
Do:
- Be honest about your intentions
- Meet in public for the first time
- Watch for red flags (money requests, evasiveness, inconsistency)
- Take your time — emotional investment needs discernment
Don’t:
- Share financial information early
- Rely solely on photos
- Let social media “pressure” you into moving fast
- Ignore gut feelings
The Role of Platforms
Dating apps and social media companies are beginning to implement safety features like profile verification, reporting tools, and scam warnings — but enforcement remains weak.
“Platforms have a duty to protect users,” says cyberlaw expert Linda Agyeman. “But users must also protect themselves.”
Final Thought
In Ghana’s evolving social landscape, love has gone digital. For some, the apps and DMs bring joy, companionship, and marriage. For others, they bring silence, scams, or scars.
But the human need for connection remains the same — whether expressed through handwritten letters or late-night voice notes.
As Leticia reflects on her experience, she smiles with caution. “Next time,” she says, “I’ll look for more than just sweet messages and pretty pictures. Love needs more than Wi-Fi.”